I spoke a little bit earlier about embarrassing myself by eating palusami with a fork.  This got me thinking about how often I have embarrassed myself here.  The PC teachers told me that when you mispronounce a Samoan word it will become a sweaowrd.  I though they were kidding, but they were not.  There are a billion bad words in the language and I have accidentally said about half.  Sometimes in class even.  But I keep on talking even though groups of people will be laughing in my face.  There is also the dancing – this is great. 

They also make us dance in front of large groups of people all the time.  By “they,” I mean Samoans.  I can’t count on two hands the amount of times I have been pressured in to dancing in front of a large group of cheering people.  But the thing is, they just love that you’re up there so much that they don’t care what you are doing.  I try to do Samoan-like dances, but I don’t know how so I just look funny.  I think that it is more important to try than it is to try to look cool, so I just go up, dance and smile.

A PC volunteer who just left samoa wrote me a good bye/good luck note which said: “I can tell you will succeed because, just like me, you are willing to make a fool of yourself in front of anyone.”  This may sound like a weird, potentially back handed complement, but it is very true here.  I don’t think modesty exists, and shame only exists if you wronged your family’s reputation.  There is not even a word for embarrassed.  Just getting up there and “making a fool of yourself,” as we would call it, is praised.  Although most everyone will laugh, I don’t think they are laughing at me.  This could be my delusion setting in, but I don’t think so.